Thursday, October 28, 2004

friendster made me realize...

Friendster: mark telan

I scanned my friendster testimonials this morning, in search of who I was, of the changes that I have to undergo to be the “me” I see today. I really didn’t see myself as an “ill-tempered monster” during class productions the way they did. But now, I am aware of it.

But I kept on thinking about the many nicknames that I had. I try to label myself in so many ways, in different situations, as if making a fraction game out of myself.

All my life, I’ve been struggling to assume a personality, a character that I can call my own. And it can take eternity to know that person. I can wear many masks, give myself names, and try to be someone I am not and do that all my life because of my fear of rejection and judgment. I can do that, yes, only if I have a heart that does not know the meaning of the word ‘fatigue’ and a mind that overlooks the person behind the name…

You don’t know me well enough… you don’t know “all” of me…

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